How often should your dog actually be groomed?

Ask five dog owners how often a dog should be groomed and you get five answers and a small argument. The truth is there is no single number. There is a number for your dog's coat, and it is usually not the one you are using.

Short coat: every six to eight weeks

Labradors, Boxers, Staffies, Beagles, Dachshunds. Nothing to cut, but plenty to wash, and the nails and ears still need doing. The Healthy Essentials every six weeks or so keeps the smell down and the nails off the tiles. The shedders add de-shedding in spring.

Medium coat: every four to six weeks

Golden Retrievers, Border Collies, Spaniels. These coats look after themselves right up until they do not, and then the feathering on the legs and tail mats in a week. A Signature Pamper every four to six weeks, with the hygiene trim keeping the feet and the back end tidy, stops that happening.

Long coat: every three to four weeks

Shih Tzus, Maltese, Yorkies, and the poodle crosses with hair that never stops growing. This is the group that gets into trouble, because the coat looks fine from across the room while the mats build underneath. Every three to four weeks on the Grand Fontein, with a proper cut, is the honest schedule. Stretch it to eight and the groomer has to go shorter than either of you wanted.

Double coat: every six to eight weeks, more in spring

Huskies, German Shepherds, Chow Chows, Malamutes. Never shaved, always de-shed. Six to eight weeks for most of the year, every two to three weeks while the winter coat comes out. Your vacuum cleaner will send a thank-you note.

Wire coat: every six to eight weeks

Schnauzers, Fox Terriers, Airedales. The wiry jacket needs tidying and the beard and eyebrows need shaping, or the dog starts to look like a retired professor. Six to eight weeks.

Cats

Short-haired cats, when they need it. Long-haired cats every four to six weeks, or sooner if you feel knots behind the ears.

The part nobody tells you

The schedule matters more than the package. A dog groomed every four weeks on the Healthy Essentials is in better shape than a dog that gets the full works twice a year. That is why the booking lets you set a repeat: weekly, every two weeks, every three weeks, monthly or every six weeks. Pick the gap that suits the coat, pay as each visit comes up, and the van turns up without you having to remember. Set it up here.